You need to be SINGLE to understand Sex and the City

I sometimes find myself in the middle of a conversation thinking what I could have done in my life to have deserved to be part of such a conversation. And during those rare but momentous occasions, I always get this nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach…the urge of slapping who I’m talking to at that moment and telling the half-wit, “What did you say? Seriously?”

A week or so ago, I got myself in such a conversation with an officemate. We were talking about Sex and the City, The Movie. I was telling her that I really liked the movie and it has been the only movie for quite some time that I enjoyed watching. Apparently, she also watched the movie and wanted to tell me how much she was not able to “relate” to the movie.

Basic fact to know before reading the following conversation: I, XTIN, AM SINGLE. AND SO IS MY OFFICEMATE’S COUSIN. The cousin is a girl, btw.

Officemate: Oo, nga e. Nagandahan nga din yung cousin ko, eh. Naiyak siya sa movie.

Xtin: Ako din, may times na medyo naiiyak ako pero hindi naman natuloy.

O: Talaga?

X: Oo. Nakakaawa kasi si Carrie, eh...

O: Yun nga, eh. Ako kasi hindi ako masyado nag-enjoy/naka-relate. So nung kinikwento sa akin ng cousin ko na naiyak siya, inisip ko, “Bakit ako hindi naiyak? Anong WALA SILA NA MERON AKO?” Tapos ayun, naisip ko, “AY, OO NGA PALA. AKO MAY BOYFRIEND.”

X: (@#$%^&*waatdapakkkk!?!?!...NOSEBLEED)

Huwaw. Seriously? So you need to have NO boyfriend to be able to understand or even feel sad for Carrie? Much more, you need to be single, pathetic, and hapless to comprehend the humor of Sex and the City? Shet. Holy shet. KAYA PALA GETS NA GETS KO AND TAWANG-TAWA AKO SA MOVIE. OH, DEAR GOD, TAKE ME AWAY!!!

And I thought knowing who Mr. Big was and what Manolos are was enough for me to “get” the movie. Apparently, I have to be involved in some lame-ass relationship before I could laugh at Charlotte for having soiled her panties.

And is the phrase not ANONG MERON SILA NA WALA AKO? Talk about making a statement work for you.

UNBELIEVABLE.

*then i came to wonder...what would i have needed to get the humor of KUNG FU panda? should have i gotten myself a talking panda first, so that i could somehow fathom the cute "face nerve" antics of Po? Hmmm...come to think of it...maybe i should have gotten me a panda, because I REALLY DIDN'T GET IT AT ALL. Geheddemmit.