Nursing Board Reviewers or Model Wannabes?

This is going to be short and fast. I hope.

I was on an FX ride to Quiapo last Saturday when, as I was passing by the España-Morayta area, I saw huge billboards of Nursing Review Centers. The ads were not the ordinary enumerations of what types of services the review centers have to offer. They were not mechanical. Not boring. As a matter of fact, they were too amusing and, well, hilarious.

The review centers, well at least those which ads caught my attention, have a thing for hiring models to endorse their services. But, mind you, these characters they call endorsers are not the Lucky Manzanos (St. Augustine) or the Sarah Geronimos (AMA). That would be too common, I guess. To stand out, these review centers hire...wait for it...wait for it...ITS OWN REVIEWERS to model for them. I say "model" not just "endorse" because I do think there is a glaring distinction between the two. When someone "endorses", that someone merely "poses" for the camera. But, when someone "models", that someone "works" the camera. Like so...

Barf bag, anyone?

I just cannot think of any sane reason why institutions that aim to educate soon-to-be PROFESSIONALS would resort to such marketing strategies that are so, I don't know, superficial? Theatrical? Showbiz-like? It does not help MY cause that they--the so-called reviewers-slash-the-next-matinee-idols--seem to so enjoy it. They're working it, aren't they? They are so working it that I think I'm going to enrol for the next review session. Or not. I'm not sure, but is this type of behavior, este, marketing strategy common nowadays? I mean, for example, I still don't see CPA review centers with established reputations such as CPAR and PRTC put up billboards with Mr. Valix or Ms. Cabrera on them. Well, it may just boil down to two things: one, these nursing review centers are not as established as the CPA review centers I've mentioned or two, CPA reviewers are not as photogenic as nursing reviewers. Who knows, diba?

Or...no one can work the camera like these blokes do. Move over, Piolo.

Piolo? No, no, no. Mr. Carl Balita (shown working it in picture above) most probably got his pensive look as inspired by another veteran by the name of...

Presenting the roster of highly reputable models, este, reviewers of the Sultan Review Group:

[L-R] Mr. Tall Dark Handsome Daw, Mr. Funny Little Man, Mr. Oblique Pose Gluta Look, Mr. Fit and Trim Founder, Tonette Macho, Mr. Lean Toward Sexy Slutty Co-Reviewer, Ms. Sexy Slutty Reviewer, and wait...Ely Buendia, izdatchu? They are a better looking bunch, if you ask me.

In fairness to Edmond Sultan, though. The founder of the SRG may actually be a model. Kudos to you, bra.

I have the slightest idea of how well these nursing review centers actually are in terms of producing topnotchers and passers. I would just want to get things straight, though. What I find so, er, amusing is the "marketing strategy" these centers employ. Their performance, which is surely very satisfactory, is not my concern, really. I just find their behavior a bit odd and laughable, that's all. They might be, well, GENERALLY presentable and photogenic (give or take a few tweaks on photoshop) individuals, but I still don't think review schools should resort to such advertising, taken that they are, after all, institutions that cater to the needs of would-be PROFESSIONAL...REGISTERED NURSES. The least they can do is be more professional and less aesthetic.

That was a fast enough post, don't you think?

For sources of photos above and links to the nursing review centers mentioned, refer to the following links:
Carl Balita Review Center
Carl E. Balita Group
Sultan Review Group (Nursing)
Sultan Review Group Photos
Boy Abunda

No White Pants After Labor Day

Josie Geller: That'll teach me to wear white pants after labor day.

Gibby Zerefski: Nobody's worn white pants after 1983.

Indeed. There IS something wrong with anyone who chooses to wear white pants—ever.


I’m not talking about your generic, run-in-the-mill white pants. What pisses me off the most nowadays are white SKINNY jeans. Not just white skinny jeans…those white skinny jeans on MEN. MALES. BOYS. Those with the Y chromosome.

I mean, it’s bad enough one of the worst fashion choices from the NOTORIOUSLY FASHIONABLE ERA of the eighties, the skinny jeans—or just baston pants—have made a resurrection of sorts. The worse thing is that it has to be worn by men. The freaking fit of those jeans is hip-thigh-leg and not to mention CROTCH-hugging…Holy shit. How can a guy in his right mind find it in himself to wear something so—unflattering? And why of all colors, in God’s holy name, would they choose white? Can you be gayer than that?

Well, I WOULD understand, even if just a tad bit, if a GAY guy wears white shitty, er, skinny jeans (WSJs hereafter). To some extent, it WOULD fit the stereotype. And I must admit that there are rare occasions that they do carry WSJs well. But note the RARE in my statement. BryanBoy COULD get away with it. I'd find it so difficult to comprehend if someone else fashions it. So if someone who is not actually gay wears WSJs, I’d say he would be shitting me if he insists that he is straight. So please, stop shitting me.

It just looks so…so…STUPID. It doesn’t look good. REALLY. And people who wear these shitty WSJs almost always are one thing—a douchebag. Or a specie at least. Douchebags, as I have said before, wear things that they think would look nice on them just because it looks good on others. These men who wear white skinny jeans are, to my mind, just that.

Now, since they ARE douchebags, you’d see, apart from their WSJs, some other article of clothing that would complete the douchebag ensemble. Be it a gigster cap or collar-ups…look for it…it’s going to be there. And if you look more closely, you’d notice that for every additional piece of clothing, the person looks more idiotic. Well, they are, more often than not, idiots anyway. If the jeans, er, shoe fits, right?

Getting to that portion of my post where I share my paparazzied finds. Here are some reality captures of DOUCHEBAGS who are in their WSJs:

In Greenbelt 5
Ugh. Another Ayala Mall with more designer stores. We should blame these freaking malls for propagating a culture of shameless social climbers who frequent these designer stores in the hopes that one day, they would be able to buy even just a key chain at Balenciaga (if Balenciaga does sell keychains). To me, wearing WSJs in GB5 forces to see you in that light. Unflattering, ain’t it? Note the collar-ups.

These may be not too SKINNY for some people out there. But, for me, they are a stitch too tight.

In Trinoma
No surprise. This mall is filled, and I say FILLED, with fashion victimized douchebags. And look, the guy’s on a date…with another guy. Great. How sweet. Maybe the pair of WSJs really is working wonders.

In School
Crap. Nakakahiya. I mean, in school? So this guy really thinks that he looks decent? That he’d be brave enough to let other students see him that way? Eew. Talk about oblivious. And the hair man. I suggest that instead of wasting time, money (and your life) in buying those hideous WSJs, you should just visit the barbershop and do something about your hair. Have it relaxed. Shorten it. Chop your whole head off, I won’t care, really. Just get them out of my sight. It just occurred to me that these aren’t actually WHITE as they are obviously BLACK, but they ARE skinny jeans, nonetheless, on a MALE. Hideous. With ridiculous white sneakers. Damn.

Please lang mga tsong. I hate to break it to you, but you really have to know that you look so effin gay. And that’s only good if you really ARE gay. If you’re not, lose the WSJs. Strap on a pair—a better and more visually acceptable one. Please.

See Yahoo! Answers for the alleged source of the No White After Labor Day Rule

Froshie Shocker: A Sight WITH Sore Eyes

OKAY. BACK TO REGULAR PROGRAMMING.

Back to school, back to reality. And as I promised, I will continue my hunt for douchebags and what nots, even in the confines of the halls of school.

I have not so much as dipped my toes into the academic waters yet when one fabulous find immediately came my way.

It was in the afternoon of the frosh orientation. I was part of the logistics group that: 1. prepared the tables and chairs in the dining hall for all the froshies to have lunch in, and 2. distributed the packed meals the student council ordered for the froshies.

By lunch time, I was a bit tired from pushing those tables and chairs to have the fourth floor of the college library appear as if it were the Great Hall ala Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and helping out in bringing the food up several flights of stairs. It was a good workout, though.

So there I was, hot (as in nainitan ako) and sweaty, when I noticed a stranger with a familiar face.


I went about my lunchtime duties that day but never really failed in observing "his highness". As I was enjoying myself with my ocassional glances of "HRH (his royal hotness)", noticing his, erm, physique and such, several questions came in mind:

What color are those beautiful eyes hiding behind those shades?

Is the hall too bright for HRH?

Is HRH too humble to reveal himself, his hot self behind those lenses?

Has he been crying?

OR DOES HE SIMPLY HAVE SORE EYES?

I kept on asking myself these questions and I swear I heard laughter in my head, as if someone cued it or something. If it was actually too bright in there for HRH or that he had sore eyes, I don't freaking care. I absolutely don't care much for the arrogance that he most obviously was exuding.

Did anyone ever tell you, your royal hotness, that when indoors or when attending some indoor event, just like the frosh orientation you oh so generously graced with your oh so hot presence, that as a sign of respect, you should always take your sunglasses off, even though you think they look SOO good on you?

Crap. I was really ticked off. I even thought it couldn't go worse than that, but when I saw the froshies reading their assigned cases for the afternoon and saw HRH reading with the rest of them STILL with his shades on, I wanted to die. Or maybe those shades were prescription? Again, I don't freaking care.

I do care, though, with what is going on with your face/skin. Seeing the facial troubles you are now experiencing, HRH, I definitely don't want to be you. Call 1-800-Calayan or something just so you could take off you shades already. Honestly, if you want anonymity, I suggest not a pair of sunglasses. I say go crazy with a brand spanking new ski mask. That way, you stay incognito and look as if you're exuding a bad boy image, and we don't get to see your face. See? We all win.