GWAPING

The past few weeks, the days after I came back from my CamSur vacation to be exact, I have been slacking off at work. Well it’s not so much as slacking off as it is actually pumi-petiks, as the slang goes. That is the beauty of meeting the deadline. Work load peaks right before the said deadline, but if you do beat it, it’s all downhill after that. On some days, it’s even a free fall.

Even the Creator took a rest after a hard week’s work:

God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the sixth day. Thus the heavens the earth were completed in all their vast array. By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing ; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating all he had done. (GEN1:31-2:2)

Of course, I am no god. I did rest the day after I beat that nasty deadline of mine (and made that day holy), but ever since, I have not done so much as lift a finger and break a sweat.

Though it feels utterly relaxing to be ridded of workplace worries, sometimes, it does get a bit boring. I often find myself now simply staring blankly at my monitor, at a loss of what to do next; not that I don’t know where to start, but that there is nothing more to do.

I now proceed with this entry to prevent another potentially boring chain of events to ensue. And is there a more full-proof way than to start yet another streak of virtual people watching? Oh my, did you hear that? Oh, my bad. It was just me and the sound of (upcoming) satisfaction.

To kick things off, I think of nothing but asinine and tacky words and phrases like tropa, like I did a few blog entries back. But today, the winning word, reeking of jologs, is “GWAPING”.

My earliest recollections of this word involve three guys named Mark Anthony, Jomari, and Eric. “We are…THE GWAPINGS!!!” I’d post a picture of the Gwapings but it has been difficult to find any (too bad).

“Gwaping” is a play on the word “gwapo” or a local term for a good-looking guy.

An analogy: If cute is to cutie, gwapo is to gwaping.

An individual who is ignorant to the general type of people who use the word “gwaping” would think that I would find pictures of Piolo and Dingdong dead-ringers if I google “gwaping”. Ignorance is bliss, I tell you. I hit the search button and find my way to many images from Friendster and Multiply, all somehow captioned with “gwaping”.

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PROFILE NAME: Anthony
IN PHOTO: (Front row) The long lost back-up singers of Vingo and Jimmy of the April Boys (Back row L-R) Andres de Panadero, Lemuel Arespajenante

I have never seen studio pictures as tacky up until just recently when I saw pictures like these. I mean tacky na nga, my gosh, why in the world do you have to take your shirts off? Are you trying to epitomize what a gwaping is or do you just want to see me die of laughter? Really. I don’t get it, boys.

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PROFILE NAME: Luchie
SEXUAL ORIENTATION: As manly as David Archuleta and Clay Aiken

Ah, yes, another studio picture. Two things: One, i2i should stop producing cheap aviator sunglasses so that people like Luchie and myself could stop daydreaming that we could get away with the look. And two, Luchie dear, shouldn’t you have left the bag out of the picture? Are you going somewhere or are your winnings from the last Mr. Pogi(ta) Search in there? The whole 500 pesos? Holy shit, alert the police! Oh yeah, and one last thing. Luchie, patay ‘ata ang mga kuko mo (I think your nails are dead). That makes three things, damn it.

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PROFILE NAME: Jun
PHOTO CAPTION: “me and my frends ‘rolly & viva’ ang panget nila no


Wow. Again with the topless member of the group. Really? I mean REALLY? With matching “hang loose” AND “west side” hand gestures, man, that looks so good. This picture is so nostalgic. The hair, the shirt, the visor, the image resolution…it’s so reminiscent of the 90s. The era of the original Gwapings. Well, there are the three of them (Jun, Rolly, Viva). I think we could pass them off as the modern-day Gwapings, right? Jun, Jun, Jun. Your friends are not panget. Cut them some slack. Gwapings nga kayo, eh!

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PROFILE NAME: Carlo
SHOUTOUT: “Hi guys! im a gay! i wnt a txtm8 and relationship of guy!i need with muscle and cute! If you? add this friendster. Carlo*****_24@yahoo.com or u may txt me in this no.0910-634-**** Thanks a lot!... muaaaawah,"
SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Man as man can get

And here’s our winner right here. Weren’t the BENCH BODY 2008 judges right on the dot when they made Carlo the queen, er, the king of the contest? (Note that I was not the one who put the Bench Body caption in there, God knows it was there when I grabbed the photo). Who can resist that captivating smile, the wallet in his back pocket that is probably full of (milk) money, and his washboard abs? Yes, you heard me. He didn’t hold his tank top up for nothing, you know. So you guys, er, girls out there…you better call Carlo right away. He’s one hunk of a catch, indeed! That’s right, Carlo, pose ka lang diyan…maybe you’ll find your soulmate in a couple of days lang…Maybe LUCHIE is interested.

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And there you have it. Phew! I sure cannot stop laughing, er, admiring these muy gwapitos! Gwaping as gwaping can get…I KNOW RIGHT? This wave of virtual people watching sure did steer me away from another potentially boring day.

But as for now, my work here is done. I look back at the things I have found and it was good. Very, VERY good. Off to the next wave. What idiotic word will I come up with next?